I hate everything

Today's polish is brought to you by the letter RAGE and the number DIE IN A HOLE.

Okay, so I'm not really THAT mad. I was last night and this morning. Let me tell you how it started...

So I've been wanting to try this really cool mani idea that I saw on Chloe's Nails, except all in black, so it would be really sophisticated-looking. When I was at Ulta a few weeks ago, I saw that they had matte topcoats, and CND Super Matte was the cheapest, so I got it. I've been hoarding it for just the right moment, and I decided last night was it. So I painted my nails with my beloved CG Midnight Magic, waited for it to dry, and then painted the CND on the tips, and waited. I waited what seemed like my entire life.

It was not matte.

But this isn't when I got REALLY mad. No, I thought, "Well, maybe I'm supposed to use it on wet nail polish." So I tried that.

And waited.

IT WAS NOT MATTE.

WHAT THE HECK, CND? THE INSTRUCTIONS SAID THAT YOU TRANSFORM "GLOSSY POLISH FINISHES TO A MOD, MATTE FINISH." UM, NO. THIS IS FALSE ADVERTISING.

What's the dealio, peeps? Do I have to use it on other CND polishes? In that case, that sucks, since I have none and don't know where they're sold.

So, I was now in full-out hate mode. I was sitting in bed at night with my black-stained nails (having viciously scrubbed them clean) and all of a sudden I couldn't stand them. I was going to die if I didn't cut my nails, so I went to my nail-supply drawer, grabbed some clippers, and hacked away. I've heard that you're not supposed to use these clippers, but the situation seemed dire and I didn't want to tediously file away. I was a little overenthusiastic on the middle finger of my left hand, but other than that they're all the length I want them to be. This is actually how long I'd kept my nails for a while before I started the blog, I was letting them get longer to better show off nail polish, but hacking them away felt good. I have a friend who hacked off her hair when she got mad, but I'm not into that kind of drastic change.

ANYWAY. I DIGRESS.

So I went to bed with unpolished nails, and then this morning I was in a bad mood since I'm having an unusually stressful week. I was like "You know what? Orange is the most unflattering color I own. Gosh dangit, I am flipping gonna paint my nails orange." So I did, and it was hideous.

This is two coats of CG Boundless Color Candy Corn.

Outside

Inside

I don't know what I was thinking when I bought this. Probably nothing. Whatever, this polish sucks. I would offer to swap it, but I don't think anyone would want it now that I've told you how ugly it is. Maybe you like oranges? If so, I will gladly give you this atrocity.

Have your nails ever made you want to throw babies out windows? What's the worst nail polish you've ever used? Tell me alllll about it.

- Laura